Posted by seldomseen on January 21, 2009, at 17:25:04
In reply to Re: Mothering my mother and family dysfunction. PS, posted by Wittgensteinz on January 20, 2009, at 14:37:43
I was discussing this today with my therapist actually. He's so proud of me, but to be honest, he said he saw this coming after the "punch you in the face" episode at Christmas.
Yes, it was also a huge relief to just accept my father's apology. In my family, even an apology typically just meant further punishment, and couldn't just be accepted. In fact, "I'm sorry" is usually met with the phrase "Oh yeah, you're sorry alright - a sorry excuse for a person" or something to that effect. I'm not going to allow that kind of behaviour - even from me -in my life. It's just wrong.
You know witti, I had just gotten so used to being a vessel for my mother's illness. For all parts of it - the abuse, the fear, the need. I took it all in and held it.
Either that vessel finally got filled to the brim, or I finally just smashed it (or both).
Well, you know what? There's some stuff of my own that maybe I would like to fill that vessel I guess. Good stuff too.So mom's stuff -well, it has to go.
Peace
Seldom
poster:seldomseen
thread:874970
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20090109/msgs/875330.html