Posted by Dinah on January 28, 2009, at 17:03:36
In reply to Best piece of advice, posted by antigua3 on January 28, 2009, at 14:32:43
I guess he gives me good interpersonal advice. Sometimes. But I can't recall any particular words. He's really got a thing about the drama triangle, and while I initially rejected it all, I've grown to see that there are some valid points there.
I can think of lots of sayings and attitudes I've incorporated over the years. But his actual advice is often not terribly realistic.
Ooooh, wait. I remember!
It was about sex. I'd been working on it forever, seen a sex therapist and everything, with limited (or no) success. Then in one session, he changed everything. We made that chart of the things I really hated, the stuff that I disliked, the things I had no objection to doing, and the things I might actually possibly find some enjoyment doing. He said that the latter two were plenty enough to offer with enough conviction in his voice that I felt able to talk to my husband about it and it turned my whole life around re. sex.
So... I suppose he was saying that instead of trying to change who I was or try to learn to like things, it was more than enough to offer what I could offer freely. Which was the opposite of the sex therapist, who wanted me to grow up and to learn to like stuff through relaxation.
Yeah, right.
poster:Dinah
thread:876805
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20090109/msgs/876843.html