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Re: trauma and healing

Posted by Daisym on June 25, 2009, at 0:09:23

In reply to Re: trauma and healing » seldomseen, posted by deerock on June 24, 2009, at 20:42:19

I think sometimes we all think we should be working towards NO unhappiness, NO sad memories, NO anxiety, NO bad dreams, etc. But that is an impossible goal - we are all human and live amongst other humans who hurt us - intentionally or unintentionally. And we can't undo the past.

But I do think we can still feel happiness with the sadness. We can appreciate peace and beauty when it comes into our lives. We can feel things acutely - especially with and for another. And as we heal - which is a slow, slow process for some of us, we are open to more and more possibilities - good things, not all bad. I think we get wise(er?) about expending energy on the "shoulds and shouldn'ts" and instead focus on acceptance of things in the moment.

I like the concept of radical acceptance. I also like what my therapist preaches - adjust and readjust. When you figure out a trigger, you adjust things to either avoid it or deal with it. And then you find another, and readjust again.

I guess I'm saying you can heal but not erase.

 

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poster:Daisym thread:902975
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20090614/msgs/903078.html