Posted by BeardedLady on December 26, 2002, at 10:03:52
In reply to Re: The saga continues...Chapter 2 » mikhail99, posted by Miller on December 26, 2002, at 8:39:52
> ...It something I have never been able to do, much to the dismay of my psychologist. So, by sharing the story here, I am hoping to get the courage to be able to share it with my shrink, in detail.
You need to tell your therapist as soon as possible. If you can't deal with this issue face to face, print out the posts and ask him to read them. He can even do this without you in the office. If he's greedy, ask him to cut your session short by that number of minutes, before or after (your choice), to make the time for reading.
> So, the only hope I can see right now is to learn to deal with the punishment or to end my life.
My therapist has been an excellent resource for me to end the beating up of myself. Yours can be too. Ending your life is not the only other option. If you can learn to deal with your punishment, you can learn to deal with forgiveness.
> I am open to any other suggestions, but haven't been able to think of any on my own.
Are you really open to them? I suggest you tell your therapist. I don't know how he can possibly help you otherwise.
Regarding what you told Dinah about deserving all the horrible things that happen to you from now on: talk about a self-fulfilling prophesy! How did this all happen to you to begin with? By believing you deserved the bad things this man put you through!
You have to start believing that you are worthy of decency and respect and a good life. And maybe you can't do that right this minute, but you will. And I have to say it again: tell your therapist so he can help you.
I hope the new year finds you on the path to forgiveness of yourself and recovery of your soul.
beardy : )>
poster:BeardedLady
thread:33940
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20021226/msgs/34025.html