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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
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Posted by Pfinstegg on March 8, 2004, at 15:51:13
In reply to Re: the couch.. » Pfinstegg, posted by Fallen4myT on March 8, 2004, at 15:22:18
Slacks are an ABSOLUTE requirement, no matter what else (lipgloss, manicure, OK hair, polish on shoes) I may or may not be able to muster on a given day. When I imagine myself lying there in a SKIRT and keeping it DOWN, I think, "well, that would be a cured Pfinstegg!" Not happening any time soon. I'm afraid. He's an absolutely wonderful analyst, but we both have our work cut out for us- for several years, at least, I think. Actually, one of my fantasies (for the future) is to wear my prettiest summer dress in there and be able to lie there quietly without having an apparel disaster!
Posted by Fallen4myT on March 8, 2004, at 16:34:08
In reply to Re: the couch.. » Fallen4myT, posted by Pfinstegg on March 8, 2004, at 15:51:13
Summer is coming up eh? :) I vote you wear a pretty summer dress....maybe you can add more lol's to this thread :) See, goofy as I am I would wear a skirt and or dress thats ALL I wear to see my T. I would pray I not fall off the sofa though. Ugh in your therapy he doesnt talk in that kind right? yucko if so
Posted by Dr. Bob on March 8, 2004, at 21:28:11
In reply to Re: that's hilarious but also not » Fallen4myT, posted by Apperceptor on March 7, 2004, at 22:51:47
> I read an EXCELLENT book a few years back called "A Return to Love," by Marianne Williamson, that talks about the incredible power in forgiveness...
I'd just like to plug the double double quotes feature at this site:
http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/faq.html#amazon
The first time anyone refers to a book without using this option, I post this to try to make sure he or she at least knows about it. It's just an option, though, and doesn't *have* to be used. If people *choose* not to use it, I'd be interested why not, but I'd like that redirected to Psycho-Babble Administration:
http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/admin/20020918/msgs/7717.html
Thanks!
Bob
Posted by Pfinstegg on March 8, 2004, at 22:02:07
In reply to Re: the couch.. » Pfinstegg, posted by Fallen4myT on March 8, 2004, at 16:34:08
I think it's great that you wear skirts and dresses and look your prettiest for your T! I'll do it when I safely can ( no knees flying up!) HE always looks great, which I appreciate, and I really would like to walk in there in a pink dress and heels. I'm pretty sure he would like it- and of course remark on it, so that we can have an EXTENDED discussion about my sexual feelings for him! (we have quite extensive ones as it is now, and I've got all I can handle for the moment - but there's always the future beckoning. (I did just buy the pink dress last week)
Posted by Fallen4myT on March 8, 2004, at 22:19:08
In reply to Re: the couch.. » Fallen4myT, posted by Pfinstegg on March 8, 2004, at 22:02:07
I think the future is now :) ye got the dress...OMG, youre talking about sex with in IN detail I sooo could not. I wish I had seen your posts on these talks..Go for it..wear the dress on a nice day and make a lunch date for after so if he askes you can say well...lunch..you would not be a liar...just keep your knees together...wow I would LOVE to hear your sessions lol....I do exactly like another poster does I dress like I am going on a date LMAO..really sad but true :) YOU CAN do it. WEAR THE PINK DRESS.....OMG its summer...go for it...then go back to slacks :)
Posted by Pfinstegg on March 8, 2004, at 22:34:56
In reply to Re: the couch.. » Pfinstegg, posted by Fallen4myT on March 8, 2004, at 22:19:08
You're just a sweetheart! Thanks! I'm going to do it when the weather is warmer - and I will watch my knees! Although sex discussions are definitely in, *lunch* is definitely out. He's a sweetheart, too, but the boundaries are ironclad there- sometimes I so wish they weren't..
Posted by Fallen4myT on March 8, 2004, at 22:47:27
In reply to Re: the couch.. » Fallen4myT, posted by Pfinstegg on March 8, 2004, at 22:34:56
Aww thanks and way cool on the dress. Yes pink for spring it is one of the IN colors. I do not think I worded my post too well..what I meant was have a REAL lunch date say with a girlfriend for after T so when he askes why so dressed up...without lying you can say...I am meeting a friend for lunch :D Tis sneaky but hehe would work. Then when you hit him with all the sex talk...he will be looking at legs and thinking......mmmm ya know :)
Posted by Pfinstegg on March 8, 2004, at 23:01:32
In reply to Re: the couch.. » Pfinstegg, posted by Fallen4myT on March 8, 2004, at 22:47:27
Oh, I get what you mean! Well, yes, the sex discussions WOULD be quite a bit more scary if I was lying there in the pink dress with high-heeled sandals on ( I just bought those, too!) But I think I can manage it by summer- now that you've given me this fun challenge, I don't want to let you down!
Posted by Fallen4myT on March 8, 2004, at 23:10:33
In reply to Re: the couch.. » Fallen4myT, posted by Pfinstegg on March 8, 2004, at 23:01:32
Oh man you have a killer outfit so it is a must and I will hold you to it to wear it to see T. I would think the sex talk would be not so scary as titillating :D Think HE CAN see and may ...wish away..heck he may even lose it like the people in Roger Rabbit his eyes may bug out and you may hear....oooooogaha!!!! ohhhhhgaha!!!!! He sits at your head right?????? Oh man you can REALLY get graphic your face is hidden :P I think I may be more excited about this than you lol
Posted by Pfinstegg on March 9, 2004, at 11:49:15
In reply to Re: the couch.. » Pfinstegg, posted by Fallen4myT on March 8, 2004, at 23:10:33
I won't let you down - promise! The dress is really a summer one, sleeveless, and the sandals very open; I need a hot day for them; where I am it's presently 38 degrees, so I'm off the hook for a bit.! But when the time comes, I'll do it- maybe with a little tanning spray. When anyone lies on a couch and talks about sex, it's usually tremendously arousing, anyway- I'll just be upping the ante by letting him know how much I wanted to be pretty for him! Would you like to " lie in" for me for a session? What would you wear? He's very tall and fit-looking, with a strong, though not exactly handsome face, lots of grey-black hair- definitely sexy himself!
Posted by Fallen4myT on March 9, 2004, at 17:04:40
In reply to Re: the couch.. » Fallen4myT, posted by Pfinstegg on March 9, 2004, at 11:49:15
wow YOU'RE making me hot lol..I wish I could see and hear all this in person (Good God I am a pervette) I can see why your summer/spring outfit would be a TAD off in lol 38 degrees but imagine what all would pop up :)in your session from all that cold :P Would you really say that to your T?...I lol and blush at this..yet....its sooo the "inner me". I would, if I were you add a lacy pink garder belt and make sure just the very tip of one of the garter and stalking showing...it will draw his mind..alllll the way up as if it isnt already. I still don't know HOW YOU CAN stand up after all that talk and look him in the face ....lol omg...way cool. You are cool I must say :) OK if it were me..I would wear a ...this is sumnmer now and you have pink so...I would wear a white dress...tight and short at the top with a flare in the skirt area..I have one in fact. nylons and heels...I have wore these btw but no couch...short skirt..red accesssories..white lace garder belt. My poor T has seen mini skirts and well outfits that has had to make him think..he even said something non T like once :) I do cross and uncross my legs a lot..Need an idea for winter? :D Youre sooo cool I bet your sessions are a riot. Mine are non cerbal but the message IS there :D
> I won't let you down - promise! The dress is really a summer one, sleeveless, and the sandals very open; I need a hot day for them; where I am it's presently 38 degrees, so I'm off the hook for a bit.! But when the time comes, I'll do it- maybe with a little tanning spray. When anyone lies on a couch and talks about sex, it's usually tremendously arousing, anyway- I'll just be upping the ante by letting him know how much I wanted to be pretty for him! Would you like to " lie in" for me for a session? What would you wear? He's very tall and fit-looking, with a strong, though not exactly handsome face, lots of grey-black hair- definitely sexy himself!
Posted by Fallen4myT on March 9, 2004, at 17:16:29
In reply to Re: the couch.. » Fallen4myT, posted by Pfinstegg on March 9, 2004, at 11:49:15
Btw, I think you and I would rather wear our T's :)
Posted by Pfinstegg on March 9, 2004, at 18:11:48
In reply to Re: the couch.. » Pfinstegg, posted by Fallen4myT on March 9, 2004, at 17:04:40
Good outfit! To get a bit more serious for a moment, don't you think we all have these feelings for a good reason? We just want to be our best, sexiest and prettiest selves- in life, and in with the Ts, who get so important and stand in for everyone else. I don't think we have to verbalize everything, either. Just having the feelings is wonderful (and helpful) even if we don't say a word. They know we are having them- and of course, we know it. It gives me a lot more self-confidence, bringing it all in. It all gets accepted in such a natural way, without any big deal being made of it, and, in the process, I get more self-accepting, too. It's as important as all the complex problems I have had with my parents, for example, but no more so. It actually makes getting up, making eye contact and walking out easier than when I try to hide it- or anything else. Well, not every time...but mostly.
I don't know if I can manage a garter belt (well,I have to be honest:I CAN'T!), but I'll be all eyes if you do! It's so much fun to fantasize and be light-hearted about THERAPY CLOTHING. Where else could we ever talk to our hearts' content about such a topic?
Posted by Fallen4myT on March 9, 2004, at 19:18:39
In reply to Re: the couch.. » Fallen4myT, posted by Pfinstegg on March 9, 2004, at 18:11:48
Lmao come on you CAN wear a garter belt they are strechy and comfy now days and I HAVE worn mine a few times..once a black leather one...and I make sure HE KNOWS :) I am kind of a big flirt body wise. I WON'T say a thing or make a move but :) Oh its so fun hunting lol...and um my T without details well has semi crossed the lines a few times and I love it. BUT somehow I cannot imagine talking like you in your sessions It must be a lol in a way and really hot. I think I would either not do it OR throw caution the the wind and make up hotter stuff than I even THINK :P
I know what you mean, its THE ONLY place I can T clothes talk lol. My husband, even checks out my panties I think he needs therapy more than I do :)
I almost always fox up but on T days it goes to the max....I love the smokey eye looks too and mega eye contact
Posted by Pfinstegg on March 9, 2004, at 20:09:10
In reply to Re: the couch.. » Pfinstegg, posted by Fallen4myT on March 9, 2004, at 19:18:39
You flirt! God bless you! And HE'S crossed the line a bit! This is all in a way much more exciting than what happens to me. Analysts don't flirt AT ALL. He's just a completely safe haven for a completely exposed me. What I do get to do is say whatever is on my mind, or whatever my body feels, so I get to learn more and more about me- what I feel and what I want- just totally private stuff one would never say to anyone. I can't actually write any of it here, but there just aren't any limits, the way there usually are in life. An awful lot of the *stuff* seems to have to do with him! It doesn't seem to matter whether I'm talking about stuff I'm actually feeling, wish I felt, wish I didn't, or am just imagining or pretending- it's all stuff he wants me to say. The most he'll say is little comments like, "it's good you're talking about that", or "remember that I said I want ALL of you in this room" (when I feel I've expressed something unacceptable). Once I said I felt jealous that he was going on vacation to Ireland where he would make love with his wife *all the time*. He said ,"doesn't seem fair, does it?" That seemed like a breath-taking admission! And it didn't seem one bit fair! How dare he?
He's awfully experienced, and manages to be intimately involved with me and all my "stuff" without ever crossing any lines- even a little! I guess that's what 30 years of experience will do..Sometimes I wonder what all of this is actually doing, because it's not problem-solving- not zeroing in on anything in particular. Instead, it's apparently helping me integrate all the different parts of me better. I do feel better- less anxious and depressed than I did a year ago, and kind of more substantial- like I am really occupying my little spot on the earth more fully.
But I don't get to flirt, and so far haven't worn a pretty dress, and I do love to hear about people who have!
Posted by Fallen4myT on March 9, 2004, at 20:49:51
In reply to Re: the couch.. » Fallen4myT, posted by Pfinstegg on March 9, 2004, at 20:09:10
OHH I almost fell off my couch reading your last post lol...OMG you said that one him making love to his wife in Ireland.....I am all smiles and loling...blushing and wowing . I KNOW that is a part of your therapy but..wow, lol and his reply was priceless :) he thinks fast..Man I dont care what kinda T one is that HAS to be hard :) to act all nonchalant and all hahahaha I COULD NOT SAY IT YOURE BRAVE...I can flirt and all but NOT talk like that no what jose' EVEN face hidden...I also know you cannot say much openly in here as it would be sooo xrated that Dr Bob would have us forever knocking chalk out of the erasers :p My T is a psychologist and has at least 15 years experience in 1 kind of therapy and more in another..can't say cause he was in Psychology Today and all and I posted on that but he is an expert at 1 thing in psych but :) NOT at holding his feelings in :P and I DARE not post on his slips cause I will get T bashed on the boards with concern that he is bad for me and so on...and if he is I dont care. So I never get to say a lot on my stuff cause I dont want to hear what I know already ARE unprofessional slips etc... and all. I just dont care. I have not been harmed by it nor will I. And its so fun and..YES I DO work at therapy too not just looking hot :) I buy so many outfits and read so many fashion mags :) BTW, I live in a cold state and wore short skirts all winter. Subzero and I WENT anyhow :P I am LOOPY I know lol
Posted by Pfinstegg on March 9, 2004, at 21:28:27
In reply to Re: the couch.. » Pfinstegg, posted by Fallen4myT on March 9, 2004, at 20:49:51
There have been several threads lately in which people have wondered whether certain T's were violating boundaries- I'm sure you remember the ones I mean. Sometimes, it certainly sounded as though they were. But the clients themselves didn't think so; they felt that they had somehow benefitted- sometimes benefitted a lot. I don't think anyone other than the people involved know whether the special relationships they have with their T's are good ones or not. What sound like boundary "violations" may be just boundary "crossings", which are supposed to be really helpful. You sound as though you probably have a helpful relationship which has some things in it which others might criticize, but which you KNOW are OK. No-one else needs to know anything about it. All we need to know is what you're WEARING! Then we can all go to sleep peacefully...
In other examples here on this board, there have been really damaging "violations". But the posters involved knew it themselves, or just needed a little nudge to realize it. Almost all of these seemed to me to involve rejection or indifference on the part of the T's; rarely, they involved a start down the "slippery slope" towards a sexual violation. I think that happened a lot more in the past than it does now, because of the extreme dangers to T's of lawsuits, loss of licenses and livelihoods. Don't you think every client-T pair work out a totally private, intimate relationship which. ideally, is truly helpful to the client? To describe them all in detail might make some of them sound a bit questionable. But they almost certainly aren't! They're all unique and wonderful - and no two the same. Otherwise, we'd have robots instead of T's, and no-one would get anything out of it.
Just be sure to keep on telling us what you are WEARING- and, of course, anything else you choose to tell!
Posted by Fallen4myT on March 9, 2004, at 23:01:30
In reply to Re: the couch.. » Fallen4myT, posted by Pfinstegg on March 9, 2004, at 21:28:27
Yes I agree on the posts where the people are hurt by what I call mean T's :( Mine is very sweet BUT HAS crossed some fine lines and its cool with me no harm and he may just have been smart enough to cross for a reason and all but man I aint going to bring it up and all ya know. Yes I do think each relationship is unique but some are more special and well um, he has told me as much. WHAT IS of major importance and I am so glad you recognize this is the clothes factor..I mean, what would the world do not knowing what we wear to our T's they could end up staying awake for days waiting for reports ..I will make sure I address this on a weekly basis :p
This week was RED a red dress....short....so you know all I own is short..well ok I think I have 3 new longer skirts...dress is low cut ..and black heels and well everything else was black.
So you go how often? I go weekly to bi-weekly? What are you planning on wearing next? :)
>>All we need to know is what you're WEARING! Then we can all go to sleep peacefully...<<
Posted by antigua on March 9, 2004, at 23:10:16
In reply to Re: the couch.. » Pfinstegg, posted by Fallen4myT on March 9, 2004, at 23:01:30
You guys are lots of fun. You really brightened my very dark day today.
Thanks,
antigua
Posted by gardenergirl on March 9, 2004, at 23:15:17
In reply to Re: that's hilarious but also not » Apperceptor, posted by Fallen4myT on March 7, 2004, at 22:00:23
I simply think like that old Tom Petty song sez " You can stand me up at the gates of hell but I won't back down" applies to me. I can hang in there like you would NOT believe and put up with a lot of stuff here but I do O.K :)
LOVE that song and love Tom Petty. Great in concert.
If your T thinks you are strong and those of us who have never met you IRL also think you are...hmmm...must be true!
Take care,
gg
Posted by gardenergirl on March 9, 2004, at 23:17:21
In reply to Re: that's hilarious but also not, posted by Apperceptor on March 7, 2004, at 23:30:50
Posted by Fallen4myT on March 9, 2004, at 23:18:30
In reply to Re: the couch.., posted by antigua on March 9, 2004, at 23:10:16
I have read some of your posts around and youre very sweet. ANY additions for this thread ?? Loopy Fallen wants to know :)
Posted by gardenergirl on March 9, 2004, at 23:18:33
In reply to Re: the couch.., posted by Pfinstegg on March 8, 2004, at 0:39:15
Posted by Fallen4myT on March 9, 2004, at 23:21:27
In reply to Tom Petty » Fallen4myT, posted by gardenergirl on March 9, 2004, at 23:15:17
Thank you GG I hear it all the time. I also just think I am stubborn :) But you have a point it must be true I guess. I live kind of in a war zone at times and I am OK all in all though T wants me OUT of here
HUGS
Posted by Fallen4myT on March 9, 2004, at 23:23:50
In reply to Awww, Fallen and Apperceptor..forgiveness is cool! (nm), posted by gardenergirl on March 9, 2004, at 23:17:21
GG, I have not seen him in two days and miss him lol how oddly my friendships begin but he is very nice
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