Posted by Ilene on February 5, 2004, at 12:43:40
All the great input from psychobabblers led me to choose Marplan for my next drug trial. I'm still washing out desipramine and buspar, so I have to wait another week. I want to take it, yet I don't--I feel like it's my last chance--if it doesn't work, nothing will, and even if it works, it may not last. My pdoc says there are other things we can try if the Marplan doesn't work, but I'm not sure what she has in mind, except Effexor, again. ( Like that's something I want to re-experience.) Maybe a little lithium to brighten things up?
At least she acknowledged the reality of drug poop-out. It's happened to me twice. The only two drugs that worked. She also recognizes how much I *don't* want to gain weight. She's overweight herself, which helps, I think. She commented that the atypical antipsychotics that were were supposed to solve a bunch a problems brought problems of their own. Everyone who takes Zyprexa gets fat, she said. Now we know they get diabetes, too.
Meanwhile, I feel alone, unsupported, barely functional, suicidal, inadequate, and dull as drying paint. I'm pinning everything on Marplan. Not such a good strategy, maybe, but what else do I have?
Ilene
poster:Ilene
thread:309800
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/20040204/msgs/309800.html