Posted by MCush on September 30, 2006, at 16:12:32
In reply to My Brain is on Speed, posted by MCush on September 29, 2006, at 12:54:28
I do not know if I am Bi-Polar. I have never been properly diagnosed with anything. I also don't know what to think anymore. I could be Bi-Polar?I keep having these damn attacks which is kind of what happened yesterday and most of today though it has kind of stopped now.
On Thursday my mind was just racing... nothing really irrational but my mind kept going and going and going. It was like by the time I was even able to properly recognize what my mind was analyzing at that moment I was already two or three decisions ahead.
That was accompanied by some pretty nasty insomnia that night.
Then it went on again for most of Friday till I started to drop rapidly. My mind would slow down to a crawl and I would start to get some seriously morbid thoughts going on. Different ways to harm myself though I don't believe in Suicide.
At the same time that was going on though my body felt like it was electric... like I wanted to jump out of my skin. I've had 'many' panic attacks over my lifetime and that felt like the oncoming of a rather nasty one that never quite hit me. Just the building up of one.
So while my mind is obsessing on suicide I'm also going pretty much manic. That was also accompanied by horrible insomnia last night.
Then today I wanted to harm myself for hours today while I was just trying to block it out. Put on my headphones and just cranked some music up loud for a few hours so that I couldn't really pay attention to the thoughts that were going through my head.
Then it stopped... Just like that... I'm tired as Hell right now but not too anxious or depressed, just tired.
For the Hell of it today I ran a search on Google to see if Cerebellum, anxiety, and depression were interrelated at all. Was pretty surprised at what I found.
poster:MCush
thread:690211
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/20060927/msgs/690588.html