Posted by Fathe on April 17, 2008, at 9:38:11
In reply to maybe one of the reasons I have low self-esteem, posted by llurpsienoodle on April 16, 2008, at 22:41:01
Oh llurpsie my heart breaks when I read a few of the posts here. One, because the pain these posts reveal is very emotional and familiar, and two, because I want to reach out and hug to try and comfort. Yours made me very tearful because it really hits home. A post from ClearSkies also hit home.
I am finding a comfort reading these because I feel I can open up here and people will understand. I know I have some depression going on too and I am dealing with it and going to go back on some medication for it. But llurpsie, your post revealed to me one of the major things that crushes my esteem.
I am third in a family of 4 girls. The oldest and the youngest naturally get their special station in the family but my sister (second oldest) and I have such an emotional battle going on since I was in my teens and it affects me daily (I am 53 now). We have had words of which some of hers I will never forgive her for. In addition, she admitted she is harder on me than my other 2 sisters but she cannot explain why. Around her I have become an emotional wreck - I do not like even seeing her on Holidays as the stress level I experience is not worth the visit. My hair is not right, my kitchen is not organized to her liking, if I do not feel well I am a baby, our jobs are in the same field but when she has a bad day she can be nasty, but not me ( and she should understand how stressful our field is), it is always something where I do not measure up.
She is not the sole reason for my low self esteem but your post, llurpsie, really made me think about my family and how they certainly affect me.
Thank you - I am learning alot about me here, which at times is not easy, along with meeting some very nice people.
poster:Fathe
thread:823706
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/esteem/20071011/msgs/823768.html