Psycho-Babble Psychology | about psychological treatments | Framed
This thread | Show all | Post follow-up | Start new thread | List of forums | Search | FAQ

Re: women without children » terrics

Posted by gardenergirl on March 4, 2004, at 15:37:37

In reply to women without children, posted by terrics on March 4, 2004, at 15:16:10

Terrics,
I think there are so many reasons women don't have children. However I really don't connect it with self-centeredness or mental health. I suppose if a woman recognized that she did not want children for whatever reason, that is a gift to the potential child, not self-centered. Who wants to be raised by someone like that?

On the other hand, I personally am just a late bloomer in all my developmental milestones. My husband and I would prefer to wait until I am done with school. Unfortunatly, I am 37 right now, and have my internship year to go. The clock is ticking. I am already dealing with potential infertility. Would some say I am self-centered for choosing to wait and perhaps lose out on having children the "natural way" so that I can pursue my dream, and also pursue my own mental health? Sure, I'm sure some would. But I don't want to be raising a child if I am not ready. And my husband isn't ready either. Going ahead and just having one would not be in our or the child's best interest.

And on the other hand, my mother had three children by the age of 30. She was and is quite self-centered to the point that at times we had to make dinner for ourselves. We were treated like little adults rather than kids. We had Domino's pizza for Christmas dinner two years in a row because she was unable to provide any kind of effort for her family, even on such a special day. Since she never played with us, she seemed to have plenty of time to dwell on something, whether it was mental health or what is questionable.

So I guess the short answer to your question is no, I don't think so.

I hope none of this is offensive. I think you touched a nerve for me. I have to admit, I think a lot about the consequences of waiting to have kids, but I never looked at it from this angle. Thanks for making me think!

gg

 

Thread

 

Post a new follow-up

Your message only Include above post

Notify the administrators

They will then review this post with the posting guidelines in mind.

To contact them about something other than this post, please use this form instead.

 

Start a new thread

 
Google
dr-bob.org www
Search options and examples
[amazon] for
in
This thread | Show all | Post follow-up | Start new thread | FAQ
Psycho-Babble Psychology | Framed

poster:gardenergirl thread:320209
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20040303/msgs/320222.html