Posted by Gabbix2 on December 7, 2005, at 19:30:32 [reposted on December 8, 2005, at 0:18:59 | original URL]
In reply to Re: The Green Light and my T (Happy, don't miss th » Gabbix2, posted by allisonross on December 7, 2005, at 17:38:55
> > What you fantasize about is entirely up to you, when it's private
> > It's hard for me to see such a landmine of a subject as teasing, or harmless, especially considering who the audience is likely to be on a board like this.
>
> I'm not sure what you mean. This is a a board for "social" stuff, and there are many topics for conversation. Knowing the difference between my stuff and others' stuff is the key...if it bothers me, or I don't understand, I don't respond. I don't want to judge or criticize anyone. We all need to be gentle and kind to one another.
>
> Sorry I offended you. I was simply sharing my feelings for my therapist. That has been done by others here, also.
>Discussing attachement issues, or transference is different to me, than posting fantasy stories.
I was sharing how felt about the posts
I know you feel criticized, however I stated how I felt, I did *not* judge what you did.> I'd compare it to a high school student writing public fantasies of seducing a teacher.
>
> Well, you have a right to your opinion, as we all do. It sounds to me as if there is something else going on with your feelings.Please don't jump to conclusions, as I said to Tamar, I've read too many posts from people who are struggling with the aftermath of boundary crossing T's, that's exactly why I said what I did.
As I told my t (and he knows it), I am a natural....flirt; I do it with everyone (in a classy way).
>
> I felt criticized, and cannot bear those feelings, and that makes me sad. It doesn't feel safe. I just came out of a 31 year marriage of abuse (and childhood of the same), and am trying to heal.
>Well, as I said, it's a landmine of a subject, and those subjects tend to draw differing responses from others.
I would dare say, that many of of us here are trying to heal from abusive relationships, and that's why I'm asking that perhaps you could put a trigger warning on your posts.
> My best to you...Sincerely, Ally
>
> P.S. We really never know another person, and how much better to ask some good questions before criticizing (said as gently as I can)
>
Again, there was no criticism, I said how that it was hard for me to take what you said lightly. That's a statment of MY feelings, not a criticism of what you did, there's a vast difference between the two. I am entitled to say how something feels to me.
> P.S.#2...if this topic offends you, make sure you don't read Happyflowers posts :)It's not the topic, I've never had a therapist, I've never had transference issues, nor is the discussion of transference a problem. It's the playfulness toward a topic that has so much emotion attached to it for so many people.
poster:Gabbix2
thread:586772
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20051206/msgs/586785.html