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Re: Is my hurt causing me to think too negatively? » happyflower

Posted by Tamar on December 30, 2005, at 18:25:51

In reply to Is my hurt causing me to think too negatively?, posted by happyflower on December 30, 2005, at 15:12:02

> Am I overreacting to this situation? Should I just try to forget about it, and not take it too personally? What are your thoughts? I need some advice please. Tell me what you think. Is this transference or they way he acted really was the cause of my hurt feelings? How would you feel if your T did this?

I don’t know if I’m the right person to answer, because I almost always over-react when I feel hurt. If anyone I care about had said to me, “That doesn’t help me. Do you want 9, 10, 11 or 2?” I would have felt very hurt indeed. If my T had said it I would have been devastated.

But I think after receiving the phone call with the explanation I would probably feel inclined to understand his point of view. I’d feel he was probably telling the truth and was just anxious and didn’t mean to be hurtful.

I think it feels so much worse when people we think of as sensitive are uncharacteristically insensitive. And of course, no one can be sensitive all the time. But I think Dinah’s also right: there’s something in there about not being as special to him as you want to be. And perhaps that’s how you feel with your husband too? So it’s doubly hurtful.

You are special to us. (((((Happyflower)))))

Tamar


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poster:Tamar thread:592770
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20051229/msgs/593535.html