Posted by gardenergirl on January 9, 2006, at 23:58:09
In reply to Re: Talking about anger » daisym, posted by fallsfall on January 9, 2006, at 19:47:19
Hi Daisy,
I know anger is scary. And some folks do get quite hurt by another person's anger.
But I also think that hearing another person's authentic feelings can be okay. In my own experience, my husband has been afraid to express his anger to me, partly because he fears he couldn't control it if it got "away from him", and partly because he fears my feelings will be hurt. When he finally did express some anger recently, I didn't feel hurt. It felt okay, and it led to us talking about the situation until we both felt better about it.
I think your T will value hearing your authentic feelings. And you might be surprised to feel how light and free it can be to express anger you've been holding back.
Your relationship is strong enough and secure enough that anger will not destroy it. I'm certain of that. Can you hold onto a tiny bit of my confidence in you and in your T?
What we learned about anger in childhood from "not good enough" parents is not all there is to anger. It's not the only way. But I understand it's scary to think about and to try out different ways.
(((((daisy)))))
gg
poster:gardenergirl
thread:597312
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20051229/msgs/597416.html