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Re: I went to see her afterall :-)

Posted by LadyBug on May 18, 2006, at 21:14:28

In reply to I don't want to go see my T. Tomorrow, posted by LadyBug on May 18, 2006, at 1:18:56

It was so wierd, she called me today and left me a message and told me she had circled my 5:00 appointment in her appointment book and that meant someone wasn't coming. She said, I'm planning on you coming but I haven't heard from you and I was wondering if you had told me you were't coming and I forgot. If you're not, please let me know. I couldn't believe it because everyday this week I wanted to call and tell her I wasn't going to come in because I didn't want too. We talked about how uncanny that was. What was she thinking when she circled the 5:00 hour? Did she not want me to come in? Did she subconciously know I didn't want to come? Are we that in-sync with each other? She seems to think so and said it was pretty amazing. We had a pertty good visit. She asked what she could do when I feel so low. She seems to care. I didn't leave feeling as bad as I could have, but I tend to hide my pain pretty deep most the time. It's when it comes to the surface that I can't bare it.
Thanks Daisym for letting me know that coming here and letting out my negative feelings is ok.
Thanks to all of you who resonded to my post in such a positive way. It really helped me and helped me see how important it really was to go to my appointment today so I could share with my T was I was thinking about. I asked her for her keys and if she would let me lay down on her couch underneath her blanket and spend the night. Because it would be safe. I'd like to follow her home, that would be safe too. But those aren't options. I'm emotionally drained. I have a job interview tomorrow. I'm hoping to get it but can't get too excited about it. I'm trying to make more money so I can figure a way to get out of this marriage!!! I'm so unhappy.
Thanks to all of you here. You are my rocks!
Love and Hugs
LadyBug

 

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poster:LadyBug thread:645394
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