Posted by Meri-Tuuli on February 1, 2007, at 15:05:00
In reply to Re: 'Not always a cry for help' - » Meri-Tuuli, posted by toojane on January 31, 2007, at 11:53:46
Hello! I've never met you before but I'll answer your questions...
> But concerning the article though, how does that translate for you in your relationship with any psych professionals?
Hmm, it makes no difference really. You mean after I've read the article?
Should you/have you been/are you currently forced into counselling because of your suicidal feelings?
Nope, never.
> When you say you are going to kill yourself, is that only to yourself or are you saying it to others? Do you think that saying it out loud changes its purpose/meaning?
I only ever say it to myself. Once I told a CPN, way back, but thats about it. I think I might have mentioned it a few times in the past to other psych professionals, but um, its never been taken seriously, simply because I always explain that I can't do it, I'm too chicken. But you still have these feelings and it still helps to say 'I'm going to kill myself'. Its more of an abstract concept than anything else really.
> So you never have made an attempt? You struggle with ideation though or don't view it as a struggle because it gives you "courage and control"?
I've never made an attempt but I did SI as a sort of alternative. And I ran away once which (in my mind) was an alternative.
Um, I don't struggle with it at all. I just think and feel it sometimes and it helps me deal with very negative feelings that engulf me at times. I do imagine doing it, but I just think how nice it'd be, but its like you'd imagine how nice it would be to say, (insert something unobtainable) eg live in a mansion or something. I kinda view it almost as something positive in fact.The thing is, I'm also pretty much a hypochrondriac, so you get this incrediable weird feeling of wanting to die and to kill yourself, but at the same time having panic attacks because you've convinced yourself you've got cancer or something. I mean the illogcially is enough to make my brain melt.
Do I make any sense at all? :o)
poster:Meri-Tuuli
thread:727737
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20070119/msgs/728784.html