Posted by antigua3 on June 13, 2008, at 8:48:13
In reply to Re: Restless, posted by meme3842 on June 11, 2008, at 11:08:32
Hi Daisy, and all--sorry I haven't been around much, but I've been going through a lot--good and bad--and I haven't had time, or the energy, to post.
Daisy, I understand your feeling that it is easier to be needed than to need, or to express our own neediness. It's huge for me. It's always,
"No, I'm fine, I don't need any help, I can handle this alone."It's true, I can handle things alone, but I've learned that there are people out there who love and care for me who want to help. Yes, they really want to help this person who I think doesn't deserve to ask for their help, that I have needs that can be fulfilled by others.
Sickness is a time that I've learned this. I needed help, and while I was scared to ask for help from others outside of my DH, I did it. And the results were really helpful, supportive and made me feel good about myself.
But, when it comes to therapy, other people don't understand, and it's not like I can get my therapy needs met by someone outside of my T and pdoc (oh, do I have stories to tell about him since I've been MIA). I do notice, however, that I reach out to people more, just in general, since I feel better about myself. I actually speak to strangers now! In the coffee shop, helping toursits on the metro, I can't quite believe myself. I've always been the hunched over, don't speak to me at any cost kind of person, but that was because I was afraid. But there's a whole world out there and you never know who you'll meet, so Daisy, maybe it's time to make the move in looking for a new relationship. You seem to be ready; scared, but ready.
You have to take chances. Some will work; some won't, but if you want it, you have to go after it.
all my best,
antigua
poster:antigua3
thread:834089
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20080524/msgs/834436.html