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Re: The silences.

Posted by Cal on July 29, 2008, at 5:41:59

In reply to Re: The silences., posted by Sigismund on July 28, 2008, at 21:21:53

I think there have been a couple of occassions where when T spoke I felt like she had broken the silence and felt annoyed. As I say thats only happened a couple of times, most times its me that has had to drag myself back into the "here and now" and speak. Why this last silence has bothered me so? I'm unsure. I was asking myself what would I have prefered? That T had talked above everything that was going on in the room? No I didnt want that either. I guess I feel I want to say to T, what is happening in the silences? But I'm afraid too. I'm afraid to talk about anything that implies that I know T is there and part of the relationship. I'm afraid because then I feel she will change. Its like I need to watch her in secret and in the silences its as If I am watching her secretly. But now thats not enought, I need to start to TELL her that I see her there, and that means coming down from the Fantasy mother thoughts I have and taking the risk that if I start to connect with her in the room she won't let me down. Perhaps the silences have been about me wondering of into that "perfect" realm and this time, I couldn't wonder off, I was to aware of the REAL T sittng there also?

 

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poster:Cal thread:842580
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20080727/msgs/842777.html