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Re: Borderline Personality Disorder..

Posted by Amanda29 on August 5, 2008, at 20:23:55

In reply to Re: Borderline Personality Disorder.. » Amanda29, posted by raisinb on August 4, 2008, at 12:10:17

This is the thing, now that my therapist is saying that I am not Borderline, he is also saying I am not bipolar...which is what I have been on medication for since I was 23...Im 29. SO..my feeling is this, personally I am extremely hurt because for the past six years I have been on every medication known to man for bipolar disorder and borderline persoanlity... I am now on 3...Lithium, Lamictal and Rozerem. I have been on the Lamictal the longest and I know that is a mood stablizer. So I want to come off of it. Because If I dont have bipolar or borderline..why the heck be on the medication. The lithium is a mood stablizer AND antidepressant...so that would cover my depression. Because I was addicted to anxiety medications...I cannot have anything to control my anxiety ..which clearly sucks....so, all I really feel like i need to be on is the lithium.

It just really hurts that I have been led to believe that I have these things...that have really hurt me mentally..and now, I dont have them. I was talking to my sister about it and she said that I should look at it as something positive...like now I dont have it. I COULD look at it positively but, the whole issue is that I have been led to believe that I have it. And I dont. I was told when I was 23 that I had depression, anxiety, OCD, and BiPolar disorder. When I switched to my new therapist, he told me I had borderline, that I was bipolar, that I had PTSD for something that happened to me a long time ago, I have severe anxiety, and mood swings ...that were from the bipolar disorder....NOW..I supposedly only have depression and anxiety and ocd. GO FIGURE.

I am so confused and hurt. You might be asking why I am hurt but imagine being told you had something for years...some kind of illness and all of a sudden you dont anymore. I have researched everything that I have been diagnosed with because I love psychology and mental health and studying about the disorders but, my thrapist is thinking that I ENJOY BEING SICK and that I am looking up things to be WRONG WITH ME!!!!

WHO ON THIS EARTH ENJOYS HAVING A MENTAL ILLNESS?

I am so hurt.


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poster:Amanda29 thread:843786
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20080727/msgs/844430.html