Posted by llurpsienoodle on September 9, 2008, at 18:36:43
In reply to Re: Something happened today » Quintal, posted by rskontos on September 9, 2008, at 16:25:59
Q, it sounds like you are just feeling rotten about yourself on all fronts-- you're not deserving of therapy, you don't deserve to change, you don't deserve to have someone care about you, you don't deserve to care about someone else.
The Q I know is insightful, creative, and an original thinker. He brings a lot to any encounter, and I think the same applies to therapy and romantic relationships too. You've been through lots lately, and perhaps you've rattled your core belief in yourself along the way.
I learned some interesting stuff in humanistic psychology today. There is this idea of an injury to one's conscious self that is so devastating that one splits-- the pain and hurt about the injury go to the "lower unconscious" and the creative and wonderful parts go to the "upper unconscious". For instance, say that you had a unique and wonderful sense of humor. Maybe you were made to feel ashamed of it at some point. This injury to your consciousness was so hurtful that you buried the hurt in the lower consciousness, but at the same time, your original, wonderful humor was trapped in the upper unconscious. Now you no longer have access to either the hurt (yay!) or the humor (oh no!). By drawing attention to the injury itself, and recognizing, and experiencing the pain that it caused, one is also granted access to the "divine", that part of you that you were made to feel shame about, the original and wonderful sense of humor.
blah blah blah...
Sorry, I get a little nerdy sometimes. My point (wait... what was my point?) is that it's okay to acknowledge and work with the shame, the hurt, the unbearable feelings of guilt-- these things that make you feel like a bad person-- but at the same time, you can ALSO embrace the things that make Q the great person that he is. There is nothing WRONG with being injured in the first place, you're only human, after all.
Well, I really just wanted to make you feel better, and to convey my esteem for you. Hope this wasn't too obtuse
-Ll
poster:llurpsienoodle
thread:851179
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20080906/msgs/851225.html