Posted by Larry Hoover on April 13, 2005, at 16:23:32
In reply to Re: Life After Addictions, posted by sunny10 on April 13, 2005, at 13:20:27
> Lar,
>
> Thank you so much for just validating the fact that I had posted... that alone means so much.You're very welcome.
> I have just had two phone calls. One relieving one- I got an approval to move in a new apartment on Saturday.
That is exactly what I was talking about....awareness and clear thinking, and you've already settled your housing issue.
> The other was confusing, hopeful, and scary all at once.
You can't stop feeling the way you do. There is no single right answer. You can't address your need for safety and your need to work out this relationship (somehow) with the very same strategies.
> I know that promises made by someone capable of these binges can be suspect, thus the trepidation I feel.
Yes, he's sober now, when he makes the apologies and promises.
> Say lots of prayers for me while I try to puzzle all of this out.
I'll start with this one, the People version of a familiar refrain:
God, grant me the serenity,
To accept the people I cannot change,
The courage to change the ones I can,
And the wisdom to know that one is me.> I am mostly trying to figure out if it could ever possibly work if I work on the co-dependent part of what's wrong with me, while he focusses on WHY he feels the need to binge.
I don't think there's a crystal ball big enough to answer that. However, looking back at that prayer, you've certainly got a topic to consider (co-dependency).
> Sometimes two wrongs can't make a right, but sometimes a blind person and a deaf person can mend a fence. I just don't know which two we are.
>
> -sunny10Time. Some things need time. You can't answer that question today, so let it leave your mind. You'll know the answer, in due time.
I'm glad you found a place so soon.
I'll give you one of my trademarked Bearhugs®
{{{{{{{{{Sunny}}}}}}}}}
Lar
poster:Larry Hoover
thread:471016
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/subs/20050323/msgs/483820.html