Posted by 10derHeart on September 26, 2005, at 0:16:21
In reply to why does writing about this hurt so much? » 10derHeart, posted by crazy teresa on September 25, 2005, at 19:13:44
Thanks, crazy T,
I was pretty embarrassed for posting this, and was afraid to even look back here...
But you made me feel better..and laugh, too.
Disgusting is a harsh word, isn't it? Thanks for "yelling" at me about it. I needed that.
The very word poop just cracks me up for some reason. I get your point....but as as good little messed up people can do...I would argue back...no, I'm not disgusting because I poop...but to continue a fairly gross analogy....if you started pooping all the time...right after you had finished pooping and should be fine...but you just insisted on going back to try to poop more - every day - for no da*n good reason, and you considered pooping a most favorite recreational activity....well, that's sounding pretty disgusting...
I know I have a warped relationship with food. I don't take time to enjoy my meals amy more. I enjoy certain foods, but it's far more about planning, and sitting down with my 'friend' - the food - than it is about nourishment or anything nice and sensible.
But like you said, I am trying - a little. At least I'm still thinking about it as a problem. It's just so hard to see myself as strong when I try many little changes and tricks to cut down the amount of mindless snacking and I relapse after about a day each time :-(
Not giving up. I have to try - my health is at stake, and life at this size is getting more and more uncomfortable. I feel the real "me" is lost in here somewhere....
((crazy t))) hugs back to you - I appreciate you being here...
poster:10derHeart
thread:559498
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/eating/20050314/msgs/559669.html