Posted by jammerlich on November 29, 2007, at 14:32:53
In reply to Fighting to esteem, posted by ClearSkies on November 27, 2007, at 15:41:58
Oh, ClearSkies, you are SO not a bad person. Not for any of it. Ok, so it's a part of your nature not to ask for help. But that's not a good thing or a bad thing; it's just a thing that IS. It seems like you're headed in the right direction with the whole good/bad thing, but I just wanted to say it myself!
You got the Beck workbook, too, right? I really think you could apply the concept of giving yourself credit to this situation. You deserve LOTS of it:
You didn't drink.
You made plans ahead of time to ease the
stress (puzzle). It may not have worked as well as you'd hoped, but you thought about it and it was an opportunity to learn what works and what doesn't.You actually got a nice meal together! I could probably never do this, so I'm really impressed.
You are taking this very unpleasant experience and using it as an opportunity to learn and grow.
Those are BIG things. So, give yourself a pat on the back for them. You deserve it!!
My mother's family is generally not a great role model for much of anything; but, I think we've managed to do the whole holiday meal thing pretty well. Generally everyone brings a dish or two and we use paper plates and plastic utensils. Sometimes, though, we go completely non-traditional. This Thanksgiving, we had spaghetti. My aunt made that, my mother brought bread and salad, and I brought dessert. There really is no reason for one person to do all the work and it's completely OK that you're sick and tired of being stuck in that position.
I have only hosted a holiday once, and I had On the Border cater a fajita meal. We picked everything up the day before and just had to throw it in the oven the next day. Everyone loved it! So, your husband's idea of catering might not be so bad.
Jammer
poster:jammerlich
thread:797327
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/esteem/20071011/msgs/797631.html