Posted by mair on June 5, 2003, at 17:19:48
In reply to Re: Changing Therapists - What type of therapy??, posted by fallsfall on June 4, 2003, at 18:19:27
You sound like you feel empowered. I'm so impressed with the way you've approached this. I'm particularly impressed that you were able to read your letter to her without backing off or trying to soft peddle your feelings or take blame for your lack of progress. If you find a new therapist with the same sort of direction and resolve you've demonstrated here, you'll do well.
I was initially referred to my therapist for CBT. I had told my pdoc I wanted something more short term and directed than I had with him when I was seeing him as a regular therapy patient. Really though I just felt I needed to get back into therapy and I didn't want to start up with him again. I didn't have the courage to deal with him in as an upfront manner as you did.
My current therapist started out using just CBT - so much so that she didn't want me talking about anything other than the present. I hadn't really been seeing her for all that long when therapy became more dynamic than CBT usually is. About 2+ years ago she totally threw everything out the window, started having me come twice a week and started taking copious notes in all of our sessions. She'll introduce some CBT techniques ocassionally but mostly she said I just didn't seem to "buy" anything she tried with CBT. It's really kind of amusing to me that my CBT therapist now sounds far more freudian than my pdoc/therapist ever did and he was a trained psychoanalyst. I just chalk it up to how difficult I am to work with.
Periodically I start thinking that my therapist is fed up with me and that she must be feeling she can't ever get anywhere with me. I think I've always felt like I arrived on her doorstep under false pretenses (like she thought she was getting someone for 10 sessions of stress management and she ended up with a lifetime albatross). I'm also convinced that she'd like to cut me loose but that she can't since I have so many obvious rejection issues. When I've been able to talk to her about some of this, she's been able to convince me that she's in it for the long haul with me but those rejection fears are tough to shake and I know I'll start ruminating about this all over again in the future.
My hat's off to you for having the courage to see that what you were doing had ceased being effective and having the courage to address this with her without burning a bridge. Please keep us posted on the therapist search.
Mair
poster:mair
thread:230679
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20030529/msgs/231736.html