Posted by Racer on September 11, 2004, at 13:50:28
In reply to How to respond to this?, posted by Klokka on September 10, 2004, at 21:44:17
Dunno.
Recently, in the course of a nightmare with treatment, I asked our marriage counselor to call the pdoc and say that, "yes, Racer can be difficult to deal with..." and she cut me off right there. She said, "I can't say that, because I've never found you to be difficult at all."
Now, once I got over the shock, I realized that it's not absolute. I do think I'm difficult. And I've been told many times that I'm difficult, which has solidified that belief. When you really come down to it, though, the only people who say I'm difficult are people who are not making any effort to get along with me! Anyone who's ever made any effort to meet me partway -- not even halfway, just a little bit of the way -- has seemed to change their mind about how 'difficult' I am. Some have even said as much.
So, you could try to look at it from a little more distance: are the people who call you annoying or obnoxious people who are making any effort to get along with you? It could be a sign of strength, that you're maintaining your own Self even when others are pushing you not to. That you're maintaining your own boundaries against attacks from others.
Of course, it's also possible that you're annoying and I'm difficult. But I'll bet that those qualities actually reflect an area of strength in both of us.
Hope that helps.
poster:Racer
thread:389435
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20040911/msgs/389695.html