Posted by alexandra_k on October 25, 2004, at 22:45:56
I am a boundary pusher. I am not proud of that. No doubt it has a lot to do with me not knowing myself and my limits and my boundaries very well. I guess what I really want is to find a T with nice boundaries so when I push and flutter around they are there nice and stable and hopefully some of that will rub off on me.
I am worried about T1's boundaries. She said she'd need to talk to her supervisor about whether she could see me regularly or not, but to the best of my knowledge she hasn't done that - she is just seeing me weekly regardless.
I think that she is supposed to have maybe hour long sessions. They have started to become one and a half hours as a matter of routine, and last week we went for two hours and didn't finish till half past five and everyone else had left the office.
She doesn't seem to mind about T2 and doesn't seem to mind that I am not going to tell him about her.
I am worried because it seems to me like she is going around all the rules and typical ways things are done for me. I feel flattered that she would do that, and maybe I fantasise about my T really caring about me (as opposed to just being paid to see me) - but I am worried about boundaries. About how there are good reasons for them.
About how the most important reason is to prevent burn out. I am worried that she will burn out with me. I might be interesting to see when I am in a good place, but I can be draining as hell when I am not.
Should I tell her (in the nicest possible way)?
Should I terminate her (in the nicest possible way)?
Should I slap my hands for being a T timer???
poster:alexandra_k
thread:407249
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20041016/msgs/407249.html