Posted by fallsfall on December 9, 2005, at 22:55:25
In reply to Re: totally losing it here :*** ( *warning** » Tamar, posted by Frida on December 9, 2005, at 20:03:47
I understand fear of abandonment. I always remember the criteria in the BPD definition (not that abandonment issues are always BPD, but it just expresses it well, I think): Frantic efforts to avoid abandonment.
Is it possible that you want to open up to her as a gift? Hoping that if you give her this gift that she will be more likely to come back to you? It sounds a lot like something I would do... If so, you might want to talk to her about that - ask if she would be more committed to you if you were a "better" patient. It took my therapist a long time to convince me that he wasn't wanting me to be a "better" patient. That he just wanted me to be as open and honest as I could - and that what I could do WAS ENOUGH.
A month and a half is a long time. Can you schedule other caretaking appointments during that time? See your GP, or your Pdoc? Or your accountant or lawyer, or hairdresser or get a massage? I try to schedule an appointment with my pdoc when my therapist is on vacation - so I know that there will be someone there to help me if I start having trouble.
Post here!!
poster:fallsfall
thread:587375
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20051206/msgs/587657.html