Posted by llrrrpp on May 23, 2006, at 17:03:54
In reply to Re: scared of going to the hospital *trigger* » llrrrpp, posted by fallsfall on May 23, 2006, at 15:37:51
FFalls writes: It sounds like you feel lousy, but that you really don't WANT to die. Having thoughts of suicide and even a plan for suicide are not the same as DOING it.
Yes, you're right. I only want the pain to end. Death is one path, but it's not certain, and it could be messy. There are other paths too, but sometimes they don't seem as attractive.
Well I'm going home, and I'm going to try to distract myself and tell myself that tomorrow I get up, and I go to my meetings as usual. But I don't know what tomorrow brings. I'm panicky (dry mouth, heart palpitations, you name it...) when I think about what's going to happen with the T. I think I might had better double my seroquel tonight. I haven't been sleeping, despite it... Very bad, very bad.
Psycho-Babble has been a lovely distraction today, you guys are good people. I'll hang out more later this evening. (I Think...) And I told someone special to call me every hour and chit chat for a while here and there. So that will help too.
Off chez moi
poster:llrrrpp
thread:647225
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20060517/msgs/647424.html