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said goodbye to T yesterday - really struggling

Posted by myrtledog on August 2, 2008, at 2:11:08

T was retiring. Had lovely lovely goodbye with lots of hugs and gifts and tears and laughter. She has been right by my side for 2 years, everyday. We have set up lots of ways to 'find' her - she will 'be' the second star in orion's belt, for example. She gave me a big brown bear, and a cyclamen which she has nursed. I know that i am in her heart and that i am special to her. I know that I need not feel ghastly ghastly because that will be to do with other old stuff. I know that I should feel a 'good' pain for my loss. But when i drove away there was the most almighty stab of pain because i will never again be able to tell her about that bolt of pain, if that makes sense. This is the worst thing i have ever gone through, and the person i most want to tell about it is the person who is gone. Ow ow ow this hurts so bad.

 

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poster:myrtledog thread:843629
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20080727/msgs/843629.html