Posted by antigua3 on June 18, 2009, at 10:16:59
In reply to New psychiatrist/analyst can't treat me, posted by garnet71 on June 17, 2009, at 19:55:30
I can't tell you how sorry I am that this is happening to you, that you thought you found someone you could trust and feel safe with enough to open up so quickly. It must be terribly painful for you to feel abandoned so quickly.
Please don't give up. Find another T. They will help you through this. It's common for the goal with a new T is to work through such issues with an old one.
It sounds like to me that he evaluated you, and you got really sucked in, and then he decided because of his own reasons--his issues, not yours--that he couldn't treat you.
I know you feel like he "induced" the transference with you, but please try to consider that you were sucked into it by his whole manner of caring, etc. But you can experience this with another T. I think you really need to try. I know you think he was "perfect" for you, but he is admitting that he can't be, which is a good thing for a T to do instead of lead you on.
I know this, because I've experienced it. I had a male T once agree to treat me for 18 months (the amount of time was irrelevant) and I found myself openng up to him, which I never do with a male, except with the pdoc I have now. I spilled my guts. Then, one day out of the blue, right before my 18 months were to begin, he called me in and told me he couldn't treat me, that he was referring me out to someone else. He never gave me any reason, and wouldn't accept responsibility for having agreed to treat me. I was horrified and it took me a very long time to get over the abandonment. What had I done to make him change his mind? I'll never know, but I do realize now that it was about him, and not me, and he was a complete coward.
But I did get over it. I really encourage you to find someone new to talk to. Find new references and just try it. Please?
antigua
poster:antigua3
thread:901600
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20090614/msgs/901762.html