Posted by Jost on August 31, 2006, at 10:45:08
In reply to Re: Self-Esteem suffering from depression recovery » Jost, posted by llrrrpp on August 30, 2006, at 23:30:51
That is one of life's mysteries/tragedies/sources of regret and maybe redemption
There are times when it seem so unbearable that I can't just get someone inside me-- or that they can't get me inside them-- forever-- that I can't reach in and make them happy, safe, warm, and know that they are, that nothing bad can happeninstead, it's always going to be that we're separate, and alone, unable to protect one another
I guess that's what keeps us going, too-- trying, failing, getting back hope, going for whatever it is, at that moment, that our hopes center on
I'm not good at dealing with this, either-- except to absolutely refuse to let myself be torn up-- to keep my mind's eye on the other person's presence in the world, even at a distance-- as if they're moving nearby, beyond my line of vision, in another room, just out of sight -- even if it's half way around the world
And to keep them in my thoughts, and mind. Not that I think of them all the time, but they are part of me, and what I'm doing-- especially the important things--
But that's only something I've barely learning to do-- there were many years when I would be torn apart by separations, disappearances.
Whales swim separately in the water, sometimes, but they hear the songs of other whales in the distance. And they sing their songs. Do terrestial white whales have songs that they sing?
Jost
poster:Jost
thread:681528
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/esteem/20060827/msgs/681701.html