Posted by Pfinstegg on May 29, 2003, at 20:08:23
In reply to Re: DID diagnosis after other diagnoses. » Pfinstegg, posted by Dinah on May 29, 2003, at 19:06:02
Not intrusive at all, Dinah, as I feel both protected and safe on PB. You're right about the immense difficulty of trying to be in both feeling-states at once. I think the reason it feels impossible is that each state is thought to be in a slightly different part of the brain- the neuronal circuits reverberate freely within each part, but there is little or no cross-connection between the different parts. According to my analyst, this is the neurological basis of dissociation. When it is extreme, it could be called DID, but the name really does not matter- the process of separating off good from painful experiences is what everyone does in response to trauma.
His idea is that we are working to grow some new connections between the separate parts. As you know, I am at the very beginning of this process. So far, I just present either one state or the other; the "good" one tends to feel happy, confident, loving and easily able to verbalize. The "bad" one feels unlovable, unloving, angry, detached and has a hard time speaking. What he keeps doing is, when I present one feeling-state, he reminds me that the other one is also there nearby. It's just EXASPERATING- the last thing I want to hear about- but I do see that he is aiming for me to be more aware of these two states simultaneously. I am not really able to do it, but, later on, when I have time to think about it in the evening, I can recall how I might have flipped back and forth between the two states, and can try to contemplate having them both in mind at the same time. That's in fact what I'm trying to do as I write you!
If you are interested, I'll try to let you know if I am learning to do this as time goes along. One thing he said today which fascinated me was that the so-called "bad" part needs to learn to trust the therapy process enough to allow itself to be consoled and comforted, just as the "good" part automatically does. God, this is just all mind-blowing!
Pfinstegg
poster:Pfinstegg
thread:229576
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20030529/msgs/230059.html