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Re: Do you think it would help to know... » JoniS

Posted by annierose on September 12, 2007, at 20:49:36

In reply to Do you think it would help to know..., posted by JoniS on September 12, 2007, at 16:12:19

I do think it's hard to see your therapist's other clients. Don't beat yourself up on comparing yourself; I have done that too. I think it's human nature.

I have asked my t what she thinks about me. Sometimes she answers directly, sometimes she lists qualities she sees in me (like a grocery list - the one the cracked me up the most because it didn't say anything about me as a person or my character - "You are tall with lots of hair." Gee thanks, I didn't know that by looking in the mirror) or the worst, sometimes she answers by asking me another question. But I keep asking over and over.

We need to know that we matter. And my therapist has told me that I matter to her, and that she cares about me. Knowing that, I also know that I matter in her life as a client whom she has gotten to know a great deal about. She is invested in my emotional well being. And that makes me feel comfortable in her office (most of the time).

I'm not sure I have answered your question. I wanted you to know you can ask your t those questions, "Do you like me?" "What do you like about me?" "What about me makes me special?" "What frustrates you about me?" etc. etc. Keep asking.

Often when I am frustrated by the boundaries of therapy that make it such a safe place to share, my t will remind me, "If I shared everything with you, then I couldn't be your therapist anymore." And that is exactly right.

 

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poster:annierose thread:782496
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