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Re: Jealous of Therapist?

Posted by llurpsienoodle on June 13, 2008, at 10:00:13

In reply to Re: Jealous of Therapist?, posted by sassyfrancesca on June 13, 2008, at 9:07:48

Hi Kate,
Welcome to babble.
I admire your courage to tell us about your weight and grades and self-esteem struggles. It's really brave of you to disclose this much to a bunch of strangers. You must be a strong person.

You've come to the right place for support. There are a lot of people with lots of therapy experience on these boards.

I have told my therapist (T) that he discloses much more about his personal life than most T's do. He responded that he always feels it's important to be authentic for his clients. I can learn from his missteps, and share funny stories with him. I have learned that he is a person, just like any other person, probably because he doesn't just tell me the good stuff, but also the ways that he has humiliated himself over the years. We talk about our mutual hobbies, and things like that and I have learned a great deal from him about the locale (I moved here less than a year ago). He's helped me get oriented. When I asked him about why he discloses so much, he responded that sometimes it damages the relationship more NOT to disclose than to disclose. I respect his discretion.

Having said that I wonder why your T is telling you about her "glory days". Does she talk about her own self-esteem during these stories? I wonder if she's trying to make a point that "no matter how perfect one's life seems there is always a struggle to maintain self-esteem". Is there some kind of moral to her stories?

I'm impressed that you've had the guts to confront her on this. It's probably time to get serious with her, by telling her that therapy is making you feel worse lately. If she cannot change her style, ask her for a referral for someone who can address your particular issues.

I wish you the best,
-Ll


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URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20080524/msgs/834445.html