Posted by fleeting flutterby on August 5, 2008, at 17:47:26
It's been difficult as my insurance changed and the clinic my T. works for doesn't accept this new insurance, so I reduced visits from one a week to one every other week..... T. gave me a good rate- since I have to pay for it all on my own. The thing is though, I don't feel I'm making much progress anymore...... maybe twice a month isn't often enough......
anyway-- I had a session today and ....... we are often on the subject of my husband's alcohol addiction.(causes me much angst) T. said that in a situation such as this(addiction)- the person has to want to stop for themselves-- NOT to please someone else. Because I keep wondering -- why am I NOT worth his quitting drinking? I've asked him to please quit and even left and stayed in a hotel to show him I don't agree with it. He was upset and apologetic but..... then he's right back to the "bottle". If someone really cares and loves another-- wouldn't they do for the one they love? do I ask too much?..... I guess I'm not supposed to ask that he quit drinking for me??? T. said-- a person has to quit an addiction for themself.... huh?? isn't that just being as selfish as the addiction in the first place??? gee-- I'm so confused..... does self love/care trump partner love/care??
I thought T. was on my side.... I was finally starting to feel she was safe..... it doesn't feel like she's on my side here with this.....
am I seeing things correctly?? *sigh* feeling hopeless again.... :o(
flutterby-mandy
poster:fleeting flutterby
thread:844383
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20080727/msgs/844383.html