Posted by sunny10 on May 2, 2005, at 13:38:37
I am having a problem that I was hoping you all could help me with from the point of view of the substance user.
I have an SO. We lived together up until 3 weeks ago when he brought violence into a petty argument while drinking heavily. We are currently separated but attempting to work through our issues to remain a couple.
His issue is that he uses drugs (or, most recently, hard liquor) to escape life's problems and mundane times.
My issue is that I WANT to be able to trust him, but because he has lied to me while under the influence, I'm having a hard time being open minded while he works out his substance abuse and anger management issues. (I, too, am working on anger management issues because I am afraid of confrontation and tend to hold everything inside until I either explode in anger myself, or become completely withdrawn and depressed).
Last night, I had this overwhelming paranoia that he is dating and/or having sex with other women while we are apart. He says that he wants me to be his girlfriend; that he doesn't want any other girlfriends. But this stream of paranoid thoughts just popped in my head last night (is still with me) and I can't stand BEING this jealous, anxious, sleepless person.
How many of you have
1)lied to a loved one because you wanted to use
2) been caught
3) been forgiven
4) been trusted again in all things
and how?I hope I don't offend- I merely need a peek into the mind of the other party, so I came here hoping you all could shine some light on this for me.
Thanks for reading even if you don't respond,
sunny10
poster:sunny10
thread:492705
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/subs/20050323/msgs/492705.html