Posted by tryingtobewise on September 14, 2004, at 23:36:01
In reply to I'm a broken record ****TRIGGER****, posted by crushedout on September 13, 2004, at 21:25:03
Hi Crushedout...
I am relatively new here so I don't know your whole story, but I can gather the gist of it here and you have certainly received some wonderful & thoughtful insight & suggestions.
I will try to add some levity. 10 years ago I started seeing a therapist who I developed a huge infatuation with. I thought about him all the time, wondered what his life was like, you know the drill. After a couple of years I finished up therapy with him so I could start having combined therapy/med management with my (female) pdoc. Not long after that, the T contacted me (boundary & ethical violation but that isn't my point here) because he was needing an office manager & low and behold I started working for him (& still do) and several other Ts in the group. I could not believe my "luck" in being invited into his professional/personal life.
It turns out my "perfect" therapist is on his *4th* marriage (I kid you not), has been disciplined & sanctioned by our state twice, is a chain smoker, loves to gamble, and is involved in the custody battle to end all custody battles. I still think he is a wondeful man who helps many, many people, but I KNOW his clients would die of shock if they were able to see behind the scenes.
So I guess my point, which I'm know you already know on one level, is that part of the magic of therapy is having someone who seems to "get it all right" to look up to & want to emulate, make proud, and be with. Maybe it will be easier for you if you recognize that if you were to personally know your therapist you would probably be extremely let down in many ways.
Good luck. I know it is very painful to feel things are so one sided.
TTBW
poster:tryingtobewise
thread:390499
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20040911/msgs/390915.html