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Re: Borderline Personality Disorder..NOT learned » Amanda29

Posted by Dinah on August 3, 2008, at 22:09:03

In reply to Re: Borderline Personality Disorder..NOT learned » Looney Tunes, posted by Amanda29 on August 3, 2008, at 21:46:23

I'm sorry if your therapist, or I for that matter, gave you that impression. It isn't really fair or compassionate to yourself to think of it in those terms. If it were as easy as changing your behaviors, you'd have done it by now I'm sure.

The diagnosis may be defined behaviorally, but that doesn't mean you can just change it. As I understand it, behaviors are an attempt to cope with or regulate strong emotions. It's not just a question of stopping. It's a question of learning new ways to cope with the intensity of your emotions. It's learning new ways of emotional regulation.

http://behavioraltech.org/downloads/dbtFaq_Cons.pdf

The above link may be helpful. I know of this website because I've ordered some of her materials. I haven't read this particular FAQ, but I know that Marsha Linehan's conceptualizations have helped me an awful lot. I hope they're helpful to you.

You're the same person today you were before your therapist told you these things. There is nothing that needs to be done today or tomorrow. You have time to look into it, and find out all you can.

You might find out that your therapist is the one who can help you with this, or you might find that he isn't. His own issues have a lot to do with whether he is or not, so I hope you aren't blaming yourself for what are his emotions and his responsibility.

As strange as it may seem, you're more or less doing your job as client. You are bringing your issues to therapy. You're trying to understand and work on them. How he responds is up to him. I hope he responds in a helpful manner.

 

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poster:Dinah thread:843786
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20080727/msgs/844019.html