Posted by Hermitian on July 31, 2008, at 15:39:17
In reply to Re: Labels and names **another csa trigger** Hermitian » antigua3, posted by Daisym on July 31, 2008, at 14:40:24
Two things. First of all there's something called Ego-State Theory which proposes that people generally affect an ego state to maximize their immediate well being. Which could be in a lousy context of course. I've worked for bosses who were absolute vulgarians and I couldn't figure out how they got married. Well they maintained two different ego states. The extreme cases are true multiple personality disorders, but most multi-state people are relatively normal. They are just socially opportunistic.
When one state though is not congruent with a person's fundamental values, then the trouble starts. Say you have a nice kid in the hood, who has to mix it up on the street. Different ego state - invitation for problems. So if you live in multiple states, and one is incongruent with your core values, see a therapist who can help you transition to homogeneity.
Re: "victim must not emerge." I read a paper related to something else about the victim mentality. In an complex yet understandable way, the author outlines how you have to put the "victim" in the closet, because all of the players in your drama were "victims" in some context. Given that, you also have to apply the Golden Rule of compassion in posterior evaluation of the other players in your drama. Which is hard. But her theory makes sense to me. You can read more here:
http://www.melodybrooke.com/cycles1.html
Her entire premise spans down the page.
poster:Hermitian
thread:843105
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20080727/msgs/843297.html